Happy Independence Day

I realize that it is no coincidence that our nation has just celebrated Independence Day. It is a time to honor autonomy, self-rule, self-determination. This is a celebration of freedom. It is perceived as a joyous occasion. I, like my country, have been liberated from oppression. I take comfort in the promise that this new freedom brings forth endless possibilities, as a way to quell the overwhelming feelings of loss that come over me like a rogue wave on a still sea.

Reading the words that John Adams wrote to his wife of the event, this period of self-rule might just be one of the most memorable epochs of (my) history. Although my new independence may not "be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival" it just might be honored by all men and women who have themselves experienced liberation of this magnitude. Clearly, "it ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty." Although resistant, I find myself kneeling in prayer upon rising in the morning as my solemn act of devotion to God, believing that somehow in my offering there exists a means to barter away my fears and grief that come with my liberation. The irony is this offering seems to bring comfort.

Thinking back over a lifetime there are many celebrations of independence. This is the essence of life, to be free. An early struggle for freedom is witnessed by the unstable steps taken by a toddler learning to walk without the hand of a parent. Before long, that child, now an adolescent, exerts their autonomy by obtaining a drivers license, followed by the ultimate power of independence found with having a car at your command. At sixteen, my license and my car became my lifeline to independence.

As an adult I now appreciate a different kind of freedom: a freedom to voice my opinion; to choose what I would like to do. There is also a freedom that comes from integrating your mind and body, so that any negative thoughts and anxiety can not dominate your well being. And there is freedom found in the complete surrender to a belief and practice that I am not alone in this life.

Although I may exhibit qualities of self-determination to ensure my future success, I do not see this as self-rule. Believing that “self-rule run riot”, instead I am surrounded by my “magi” for guidance. These are people of greater wisdom, courage, strength, perseverance, faith and love than me. My oppression was the absence of the ultimate connection, love. My liberation will open me up to all the love that always surrounds me. Happy Independence Day.